Wait! Please read about my first date with the Tinder Regular before reading Part 2! You can find Part 1 right here.
The future of any Tinder relationship depends on the post-date text. Don’t receive one? Move on. I still haven’t heard from The Basic Bitch and I’m pretty relieved. There’s nothing worse than receiving a positive post-date text when you aren’t interested. Sometimes a girl just wants to be ghosted on!
Luckily, The Tinder Regular sent the perfect text as soon as I arrived home from our date. He thanked me for meeting up with him and said he wanted to see me again soon. I replied in a similar fashion and then… nothing. Normally I would be in a panic from these mixed signals, “Why doesn’t he text me if he wants to get to know me?!” But he had been upfront on our date about how little he uses his phone, so I accepted the fact that I was potentially interested in a non-texter. Honestly, it’s been refreshing!
Our first date was on Thursday, so on Saturday morning, he texted me to ask about the karaoke event I had mentioned. He said he wanted to go! I was at the grocery store when he texted, so I was a little distracted, but I gave him all of the info and said I hoped to see him at Baerlic where the group was going to pregame. All of the sudden, he replied with “I have a match tonight so I’m not sure if I’ll make it.” I explained that we usually stay out until 2am, so he could always meet up after the match is over. “That’s way past my bedtime!” he said. Why did he express interest if he knew he had a prior engagement? Was he just poor at managing his schedule or was he one of those flaky guys who commit to everything with no intention on actually going? I was annoyed so I didn’t reply. He had the info. He could come if he wanted. I don’t play these games.
Before going to for drinks at Baerlic, I met up with a few of my other friends at the Summer Solstice Party at Base Camp Brewing. It was free entry and the beers were reasonable, although the lines were not. I ended up ordering 2 beers at a time so I wouldn’t have to wait in that extraordinarily long line! Being hyper-responsible, I had taken the bus and planned on staying at the festival for only 90 minutes, so I could use my 2-hour fare to take me to Baerlic ($ave dat money) !
The 90 minutes flew by and I found myself having to chug most of my second beer so I could catch the bus. I hadn’t eaten very much, so I was feeling great when I arrived to Baerlic. I immediately found the table of my friends and grabbed a seat. The atmosphere in Baerlic is very Scandinavian, but not in the budget Ikea way. The interior is clean with an open floor plan and plenty of seating. It wasn’t crowded at all for a Saturday night, in fact, it was almost empty. If I had been going on a solo date, it would have been way too quiet and secluded for my liking. Definitely not a bar to frequent if you’re looking to meet new people.
The Bar Pros
Central location in the inner eastside
Bus stop literally outside the front door!
Clean, crisp interior design
Extra friendly bar staff
Plenty of seating to accommodate groups
Bright natural lighting
I asked the bartender to serve me her favorite stout and then returned to the table to sit down with my friends. Then I realized – my beer was NOT a stout. It was amber in color and tasted like a lager. Either it was a really shitty stout or I was given the wrong beer.
The Bar Cons
Can I please receive the beer I ordered?
Middle aged patrons
Not good date lighting
Metal chairs are not very comfortable
While we were tasting and debating the type of beer I was served, I received a text from The Tinder Regular saying he was on his way. Surprise!
I didn’t have time to exchange my drink, so instead I downed it. How else are you supposed to cope with a sudden second date? I didn’t expect him to come! I had to debrief my friends and tell them not to bring up anything awkward like my habit of sending drunk peeing snapchats.
When he arrived, I can’t say I was sober, but I was coherent. I was a perfect 5/10 on the International Drunk Scale where 0 means you’re stone cold sober and 10 means you’re passed out and/or vomiting. I was able to hold an extended conversation, but too drunk to care what I was saying.
He approached our table and took the seat next to me. My friends gave me the “Damn, he’s fine!” look and I introduced him around the table. My drink was empty so I went to order a proper stout – this time I got one. I checked my phone and my friend texted me, “So I just asked the Tinder Regular how you guys met and he gave the whole story of how you blocked him! I’m so sorry for bringing it up!” Clearly he was still hung up on that. Get over it!
The next 3 hours flew by. I primarily talked to the Tinder Regular the entire time, but I have no recollection of what we talked about. I have one memory of trying to say something in Korean and him laughing and saying “That’s so formal, no one says that!”
Otherwise, I have no recollection of anything I said. I know I get weird when I drink, so that’s terrifying.
Suddenly, everyone was leaving. I asked if we were going to karaoke and they said they were going to go to another bar on N Interstate. Hell no! I don’t go above Alberta. The Tinder Regular and I decided to stay behind and finish our drinks. As soon as my friends left, he got touchy. Our legs had been touching under the table the entire time, but now he started squeezing my knee in casual conversation. It was pretty awkward. Isn’t that what middle aged men do when they’re trying to seduce minors? I’ve never seen a young couple engage in knee squeezing. It wasn’t even appropriate given the context. I think we were talking about beer and I said I liked dark beer and he squeezed my knee and said, “You seem like a dark beer kind of girl!” What does that even MEAN? By this point, I was drunk and tired and not feeling very into it.
He asked if I wanted to go down the street to Double Dragon. We closed out (HE DIDN’T PAY FOR MINE AGAIN) and went outside. I was only wearing a tank top and jeans and the temperature had dropped significantly. He asked if I wanted his jacket and I said no. Halfway there (a mere 2 blocks), he asked again. Is jacket wearing a fetish I’m not aware of? Let it go, buddy.
Double Dragon was also surprisingly empty for 11:30 on a Saturday. I ordered a vodka soda and he got a beer (ON SEPARATE TABS).
Again, I have no idea what we talked about. I was beyond comfortably drunk. A solid 7/10 on the International Drunk Scale. I wasn’t nauseous, just exhausted. Luckily I was wearing my drinking contacts so my eyes weren’t sleepy or dry. I powered through for another hour, nursing my drink. I knew if I drank it, I would die.
I’m not sure why, but the date was boring. It felt like I was hanging out with my brother. Any chemistry we had was suddenly gone. So when he asked, “So where are we going next?” in a suggestive tone, I drunkenly retorted, “I don’t know about you, but I’m going home.” He replied with a depressing, “Oh.”
My iPhone 6 is on its last leg, so the battery is unpredictable. I tried to call an Uber, but it was on 1%. I didn’t want to call one and then have my phone die when he was en route. I asked if I could log into my Uber account on his phone. He said sure, but for some reason, it wouldn’t work. We fiddled with it for a good 10 minutes before I gave up and just called one from my dying phone.
As with most Uber rides, the driver suddenly arrived earlier than expected and started calling me relentlessly. I had to rush out. I gave the Tinder Regular the rest of my drink and he chugged it. We exchanged a quick peck on the lips and he said, “Can I see you Wednesday?” and I said sure.
Of course, my phone lasted on 1% for the next 15 minutes (and yet today it died when it hit 30%. Explain that!) so the entire Uber ordering fiasco was unnecessary. I woke up the next morning severely hungover, but with no post-date text. Was I really that much of a drunk mess? Was he just butt hurt that I didn’t invite him home? I shot him a witty text about my bizarre Uber ride and he immediately replied. We had a little conversation and he asked, again, if I wanted to hang out on Wednesday. I said, “Of course!”
Later that morning, I found an embarrassing photo on my phone of me drunkenly trying on the shirt of some (homeless?) guy one of my friends invited to Baerlic. Great. Why does the Tinder Regular still want to see me?!
Fast forward to Wednesday and I still haven’t heard from him. I’m still a little embarrassed about how drunk I was in front of him. I’m also a little relieved he might be ghosting. Between the lack of texting and the totally boring second date, I don’t feel much excitement at the prospect of seeing him again. Did I mention our second kiss was also as “meh” as the first? Granted, it was a peck, so its hard to make that exciting, but still….
On Wednesday evening, he texted.
“Sorry I fell off the face of the earth. Life has been overwhelming.”
Well that’s a bullshit excuse if I’ve ever heard one. I try to be polite and respond with an upbeat, “It’s okay! Pretty sure I deserve it since I did the same thing to you awhile back!” We texted for the next couple of hours, but then nothing. No plans established. I accepted the fact that this was the beginning of the end…
… until he texted me on Friday to ask how my meeting with my financial planner went. I had mentioned this tiny fact on Saturday and was surprised he remembered. Then he proceeded to ask when I was free.
The old me would have started to fade at this point. I would have convinced myself that there’s no point in pursuing anything since I don’t feel excited about it.
This time I’m going to take a chance. We have a date planned for happy hour at the new Century bar and I’m not going to pregame. I’m going to have one drink so I can accurately judge my feelings and hopefully redeem my dignity. I’m going to give this a fair shot without sabotaging myself as soon as something becomes “scary.”
After all, he’s pretty great. The only thing holding me back is his lack of communication and my lack of excitement. But do all romances really have to start with a strong spark? Don’t slow smolders lead to flames, too? I’m seriously asking. I know nothing about fire management.
The Bro: 4/10. Entirely unmemorable.
The Bar: 6/10. Decent beer, decent decor, far too empty.
Update: We went on a third date! Read about it here.